A friend of mine once said that not forgiving is like holding hot coals in your hands, threatening to throw them at someone, when all you get is burned hands -- better to drop the coals, through forgiveness, than keep getting burned. Forgiveness is for you, not the other person. It relieves you of the burden of carrying anger and resentment toward another, or even yourself. Healing is for yourself when you forgive another person. Their response to you forgiving them can be a bonus, but it isn't necessary, as proven by the fact that we can forgive people that are no longer alive.