Gottman Method therapists in Bedford, New York NY

I am a fat, queer, neurodiverse, cisgender therapist who knows the importance of feeling seen and understood by your therapist. As a member of the LGBTQ+ community I want to offer gender and queer-affirming services to those who identify as gay, lesbian, transgender, TGNC, gender non-conforming, genderqueer, gender fluid, intersex, CNM, polyamorous, kink, and questioning. I also believe in the importance of sharing space for multiple identities and being a culturally competent provider.  

My goal as a therapist is to create a warm, supportive, genuine and safe environment where you alone or with your significant other feel comfortable sharing with me your negative repetitive pattern that prevents you from from sailing through your relationship more smoothly. I want to help you to reinvent your marriage or long term relationship so that your lives intersect in the same space so I can get the opportunity to teach you how to respect each other's differences and teach you how you can agree to disagree and yet you are still able to say "I love you." I can help you both to come up with a common love language when you are home and happy or not so happy; and I can also teach you another love language that works well publicly. One works well in the bedroom and the other works well in front of strangers. All couples must develop love languages that work well privately and publicly. I want your relationship to maintain the love that brought you together in the first place. You may wonder why your love is not consistent, and you may notice that the respect you once had for one another has dissipated and the personal meaning once attached to your relationship is no longer there.. Most couples in your situation have what I refer to as their own "dance of anger" that happens again and again and again. By this, I mean couples fight about different issues but the way that they fight takes on a repetitive negative pattern and that pattern is their way of expressing anger and/or rage, regardless of the argument at hand. I refer to the way that most couples argue and fight as their "dance of anger". Remember, you can't change your partner and that is why you need professional advice. I can be your "go to person" who can teach you how to effectively communicate when you once again have disagreements that can be a threat to the survival of your relationship. I only accept accept couples who really want to preserve their relationship and can tell me that they are willing to put in the hard work, because married monogamous relationships are difficult to sustain, but by taking your marriage vows seriously, you both signed up for a loving partnership for a lifetime. Taking your vows and dancing at your wedding is just not enough because everyone's life is difficult. Life is more like "a bowl of cherries" and despite the succulent juice from the cherries, you will still have to deal with "the pits." We can't always dance through our problems. Despite making yourselves an expensive wedding or having gone to the court to take your vows,-what all married couples dwell on is trust. Is one person feeling like they don't trust the other or both feel the same way when it comes to trust, then pick up your phone to call Lorna Hayim-Baker at Riverdale Therapy & Counseling Services. I offer a free phone consultation before accepting new couples. I tell the truth when I counsel couples, and therefore, I vet each couple before I agree to meet with them in an "in person session" to avoid sessions where one partner or both can blow up my session because their personality does not mesh well with mine. My heart goes out to everyone who is about to experience "a bad breakup" or "a disastrous divorce.". I go many extra miles for each and every couple who comes into my office. I try to understand their shared stories and having a shared story is a lot easier to problem solve because they are in sync; but more often than not, I have to hear out each partner because they each have different stories to tell. I decipher their own personal stories because, in reality, there are two different versions of the same presenting problem and then their is the third version which is the most realistic story. It is only fair to hear each partner's voice as they often come to session offering their own point of view, but if one pays close attention, it often seems like there are 2-3 different problems; but in reality, there are two different sides about he same problem and sometimes even a third side that the therapist discovers and is being presented by each person. All three stories are different versions of the same problem. All sides are carefully listened to and It takes time to hear each person's interpretation of the same arguments. All stories are aired and I do my best to come up with possible solutions by providing lots of feedback. Couples can disagree with me about possible solutions that are offered. I have become very attuned to my couples because I have been doing this type of therapy for a very long time. I listen carefully to their presenting problems before providing feedback. I am not always right but I am pretty intuitive at this point in my career. Someone must try to understand the couple who came in to preserve their relationship and the hope is that I, as their therapist will remain neutral and unbiased in order to shed light on why the couples are not hearing each other as they each struggle to voice their complaints. More often than not, one or both partners become very defensive and neither one is listening to the other and their fight escalates. That's why they need an unbiased and caring therapist to intervene and help the couple deescalate by having them share the details of the original complaint that turned into a communication breakdown. Couples begin fighting right in front of me & my job is to stop their dispute and call a halt to their bickering so we can examine why their communication pattern broke down in the first place. Both partners are acting out and becoming nasty and defensive. Each partner had the same wish, which was to have their voice heard as he or she expresses their own complaint. I need to point out when their wheels are spinning but they are getting nowhere and they are in fact, stuck. Couples need to stop and listen to each other so I can help them come up with a plan that can get them "unstuck." To be an effective couples' counselor means that at the end of the session, the couple walks out with a sense of having a shared understanding of their problems and with a shared sense of hope because they learned how to tackle the types of ineffective communications that lead to "blow out fights" Hopefully, I will be your therapist who teaches you how to not add fuel to the fire. I want to be part of the solution and teach couples how to stop turning molehills into mountains. I am the therapist who loves watching love as it grows and makes both partners seem so much more mature.  

Happy Apple offers virtual and in-office psychotherapy for a variety of ages and concerns. Among the most common reasons our adult clients see us are for the treatment of couples concerns, anxiety, stress, trauma, low self-worth, relationship struggles, depression, and life transitions. Children and teens often seek us out for help managing anxiety, depression, school and peer challenges, behavioral issues, trauma, self-harm, lgbtq concerns, worry, and low self-esteem. We treat our clients individually, as couples, as families, and in support groups. Adults often seek us out for the treatment of anxiety, depression, trauma, and couples counseling. Happy Apple therapists & coaches are compassionate, trustworthy, non-judgmental, and easy to talk to. Feel free to select your therapist, or let us recommend someone for you based on your unique therapy goals.  

Do you have feelings of anxiety, depression, instability, or codependency within your relationships? Do you want to find the right partner(s) or improve your current relationship but are not sure how? Are you tired of the dating game and choosing people who are unavailable? You want to be able to show up authentically for connection and chose others who can meet you there as well. The truth is you want to build relationships grounded in belonging, acceptance, growth, and healing, but are not sure where to start. We will dive deep to understand the relationship patterns and attachment styles that unconsciously guide your interactions with family members, partners, workplace colleagues, and even yourself. Together we will develop practices for self-exploration, communication, and connection. You have the inherent capacity and self-knowledge to grow, heal and thrive. I work with clients experiencing relationship challenges with parents, dating, committed relationships, friends and within workplace settings, helping them to create intentional relationships where they feel safe, fulfilled and supported. I am a trauma-trained therapist with additional training from the Ackerman Institute for the Family, the Gottman Institute, and the Internal Family Systems Institute. I have a deep commitment to and passion for creating a safe space with individuals from all races, genders, sexualities, religions, abilities, and life paths. If you want to feel more connected, fulfilled and in alignment with yourself, feel free to email me for a free 20-minute phone consultation. Looking forward to hearing from you.  

At PSYCHē, we pair clients with their perfect therapist. PSYCHē is a private network of expert therapists specializing in hand-selecting top psychologists and counselors across multiple states. Our network includes a variety of therapists in multiple states so we can provide our clients with solid, research-based therapies that work. We offer Individual Therapy, Couples Therapy, Family Therapy, DBT and RO-DBT Groups, and Child & Adolescent Therapy. Looking for a therapist but not sure where to start? That's where we come in. Our goal is simple: We want to connect you with your perfect therapist. The first step is the Consultation. You'll meet online with an expert PSYCHē clinician who knows the right questions to ask in order to determine what kind of therapist will be the best fit for you. After a thorough review of your history, goals, and what you’re looking for (and NOT looking for!) we go to work getting you matched and scheduled with someone who can help. Why wait? Leave the searching to us. Our Therapy Services Specialists (TSS) know therapy and they know therapists. The Consultation provides the opportunity to share all of your concerns, goals, desires, and what you're looking for (and NOT looking for!) with our experts, allowing them to handle the rest. After presenting your case to our in house experts, the TSS will meet with you a 2nd time to share expert recommendations, answer questions, and connect you with a clinician. We aren’t satisfied until you understand the WHY. The next step is to start! You will be connected to your clinician and introduced to the Clinical Concierge who will serve as your guide and supporter throughout treatment. If it doesn’t work out or doesn't feel quite like the right fit, no problem. We’ll make it right. Let us do the work for you. Schedule a Consultation today. We have immediate openings with the top therapists in the nation available in multiple states.